The Teens of Panem
by GatnissShamyClato
Summary: A series of oneshot parodies set AU - I take requests. Nothing should be taken seriously. Any characters. Don't forget to review!
1. Snow Hope

**A/N: omg what am I doing. I don't even know. I decided to write a series of Hunger Games oneshot parodies. They will all be AU, set in modern day High School. If you think that I should stop, please let me know! But if you do think I should carry on, I'm open to ideas/requests or whatever. Don't take anything from this point onwards seriously.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these awesome characters.**

**Clove POV**

Clove was sitting at the back of the classroom with her best friends Annie Cresta and Katniss Everdeen. Well, _best friends_ wasn't really the term – they were really just annoying people who wouldn't leave her alone, but still. They weren't supposed to be sitting together but their teacher, Mr. Abernathy, had fallen asleep again. Or maybe he'd passed out. Either way, it was a double lesson of freedom. Everyone was sitting with their friends, no one even aware of what work they were supposed to be doing. Clove looked around. There was the popular boys sitting together - Cato, her super hot boyfriend, Marvel, who seemed to think he was a player but she didn't remember ever seeing him with a girl and the legendary Finnick Odair who was the most popular boy in the school and happened to be dating her friend Annie. Oh and Peeta Mellark was sitting with them but he was most definitely _not_ one of the popular boys. He was the biggest wimp she knew and his only hobby was stalking Katniss. In other words, _weird._ She glanced to her right and saw the other group of girls in the class. There was Glimmer, the biggest slut she'd ever come across, and her posse Madge and some redheaded girl Clove didn't know the name of. Glimmer hated Clove almost as much as Clove hated her back. It was obvious that she was just jealous of Clove's boyfriend. Glimmer had wanted Cato since the first day of school but he didn't go for whores, unfortunately for her. Ha.  
Then, right in the corner of the room was Gale Hawthorne, who refused to sit with anyone or speak to anyone unless it was Katniss. No one wanted to sit with him anyway - there was a somewhat depressing atmosphere around him.  
"Cato's starring at you again," Katniss told Clove, grinning like a buffoon.  
Clove looked over to see Cato smirking at her with a wink.  
She stuck her middle finger up at him and turned back to her friends.  
"Have you seen Glimmer's skirt today?" Annie asked them, shaking her head. "She may as well be wearing nothing."  
"I'm sure she would if she could," Clove frowned as her friends laughed in agreement.  
Glimmer's head snapped up to glower at Clove. Oops. Maybe they'd been talking louder than they thought.  
"What?" Clove snarled, starring straight back at Glimmer.  
Cato noticed and turned in his chair.  
"Ladies, is there a problem?" he asked calmly.  
"Nothing I can't handle," Clove replied, never taking her eyes off of the blonde bimbo in front of her.  
"Cato, honey, why don't you send your girlfriend back to playschool where she belongs?"  
Oh, that bitch.  
"Hey don't talk about her like that-"  
Cato was suddenly being cut off by a booming voice through the speakers in the ceiling.  
"Cato to the principals office, that's Cato to the principals office."  
He groaned.  
"What now?" Cato sighed to himself.  
"I'll be waiting right here for you," Glimmer purred.  
"Bitch, please." He then turned to Clove and mouthed 'be back soon.'  
"Like I care," Clove huffed, watching him walk out the door.  
"You should cut him some slack. He'd never dream of doing anything with Glimmer," Katniss insisted.  
"Hmm," was all Clove said back. She wasn't so sure.  
Suddenly a piece of paper flew on to their table.  
Annie unfolded it and started giggling. "It says I love you, from Finnick" she smiled.  
"Oh my God, Annie! How could you be so insensitive?!" Katniss cried, slapping the other girl round the face. "Can't you see Clove is worried about Cato leaving her for Glimmer?"

"Gee, thanks," Clove muttered and rolled her eyes.

"Oh right, I'm so sorry, Clove." Annie amended.

"Whatever."

Annie then got up and threw the paper back at the boys table, addressing Finnick.

"Why would you send this to me? Does this really look like a good time? God, you can be so stupid, you know that?"

"Exactly!" Katniss joined in.

"Ugh, will you stop being so loud, some of us are trying to do our online shopping," Glimmer sighed, loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Oh, fuck off," Clove muttered, throwing a chair at her.

Glimmer just glared at her for a second before turning back to her friends to talk some more pointless crap.

"Hey, Katniss," Peeta suddenly called over to them.

"What do you want Mellark?"

"You… you look really pretty today."

Katniss pretended to throw up.

"Ew. Go away."

"Yeah, Peeta, go away," Annie backed her up.

"Do you guys ever stop repeating each other?" Clove asked in exasperation.

She may have hung around with them but they annoyed the hell out of her.

"I wonder why Cato went to the principal's office," Annie wondered out loud, ignoring Clove.

_Actually_, Clove thought, _that's a good question_…

**Cato POV**

Cato strolled down the hallway on his way to the principal's office. _I wonder what I've done this time_. Not that he really cared. As far as he was concerned, school could suck it. All he needed was his hot girlfriend Clove and he was happy. Oh, and his friend Finnick Odair. Man, that guy was beautiful.

Cato knocked on the door of the office and waited to be called in.

"Ah, Cato," he was greeted.

"Principal Snow," he replied, taking a seat at the opposite side of the desk to him. Principal Snow was usually really harsh on all the other kids but had this strange sort of obsession with Cato and never really punished him for anything.

"Is something wrong, sir?"

Principal Snow just nodded, slowly, resting his hand on his beard-covered chin.

"Sadly, yes there is. I was watching you in your lesson just now and I'm afraid to say I saw you having multiple conversations with other students. You know the rule – no talking in lesson."

"Well, Mr. Abernathy had passed out or something, so everyone was talking." He paused and backtracked. "Wait a second, what do you mean, you were _watching_ me in my lesson?"

Principal Snow shrugged as if the answer was obvious.

"I watch you in all your lessons Cato. Why do you think there's only CCTV in some rooms?"

Cato thought this over for a second, the levels of concern in his brain steadily rising.

"So you're saying that you only put CCTV cameras in the classrooms that I have lessons in?"

Snow, stood up and slowly made his way around the desk.

"What can I say, Cato?"

He made it to the other side and sat down on the desk, in front of where Cato was perched in his chair.

"There's something about you. You're different from the others…"

He leant forward slowly with each words so that his face was right in Cato's way.

"Oh, uh, really?" Cato replied, subtly edging out of his chair and trying to turn his head to see whether the door was locked.

"Don't tell me you haven't noticed that I act differently around you."

"Well, I-"

"It's because I can't help myself."

_Oh, God._

"I'm not entirely comfortable-"

Without warning, Principle Snow threw himself onto Cato's lap and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"Take me, Cato!" he cried at the top of his lungs.

In that second, the door of the office swung open.

"Yo, President Snow-" It was Clove, who stopped what she was saying abruptly, choking a little.

"Clove, babe, it's not what it looks like-"

"Oh my God!" she screamed. "You're cheating on me with _him_? With the principal?!"

"No, of course not-"

"What?" Snow exclaimed at Cato's words. "What do you mean no you're not? I thought we had something special!"

"Are you kidding me? Of course we don't – we don't have _anything_!"

"Then why did you come to my office?"

Snow seemed genuinely upset.

"Because _you called me here_!" Cato yelled back.

"I don't believe this," Clove spat, running out the room.

"Clove, wait!" Cato called after her. When she didn't respond, he took off running in the direction that she went.

"Cato, what about us?" Snow shouted, on the verge of breaking down.

"We're through!" Cato bellowed over his shoulder, still jogging down the corridor.

Just another normal day at school.

**Clove POV**

Clove kept running until she reached the classroom that she'd just come from. She stopped in the doorway, catching her breath.

"What's wrong, Clover?" Katniss asked jumping to her feet.

"I caught him making out with Snow! Principal _fucking_ Snow!"

"Oh Lord!" Annie cried.

Glimmer started snorting with laughter which was really just too much for Clove. Clove went over and kicked the girl square in the face, making her scream and flail like the idiot she was.

Suddenly, Cato appeared behind her and attempted to grab her arm but she was much too quick.

"Oh, Finnick, you're looking fiiiine today!" Clove cried, running over to Finnick Odair, grabbing his hair and pulling his lips to hers before he could do anything to stop her. Good. Give Cato a taste of his own medicine.

"Clove!" Cato snarled, charging towards them.

"Finnick!" Annie screamed, ripping him away from Clove's grip. "You bitch!"

Annie slapped Clove around the face with a whole lot of force.

"Don't touch her!" Cato roared, shoving Annie to the ground.

"That's my girlfriend, you dick!" Finnick exclaimed, punching Cato in the face.

"Don't touch my Cato!" Glimmer squealed, jabbing Finnick in the eyes.

Katniss, marched over and yanked on Glimmer's long blonde hair.

"He's not your Cato, he's Clove's!"

"Who gave you permission to touch Glimmer's hair?" Madge hissed, digging her nails into Katniss's back until she collapsed with a scream.

"Katniss!" Peeta screamed, running over as fast as he could to comfort her. Unfortunately, he tripped over a chair leg on the way, skidded across the floor and gave himself a carpet burn. He took one look at his leg and burst into tears.

"Katniss! I'm _bleeding_!" he bawled, louder than you would have thought possible.

Some lesson this was turning out to be.

Clove walked over to Gale, who was the only one not fighting. He had remained in his seat the whole time, not even acknowledging the others.

"Wanna come back to mine?" she asked.

Gale just looked up at her blankly.

"Is your name Katniss?"

"Uh, no…"

"Then no."

Clove just stared at him.

"Oh."

Well. There went the semi-decent ending to her otherwise terrible day.

She growled and stormed out of the classroom, shouting over her shoulder as she went.

"I'm so through with dating anyone!"

"Me too!" a voice joined in with her out of nowhere.

When she spun around she saw that it was Principle Snow, holding out his hand for her.

"Want to get out of here?"

Clove just looked at him for a moment or two, then back at Cato who was wrestling Marvel to the ground.

"Ah, what the hell."

So they set off together down the hallway and Clove vowed never to take another step into Panem High School again.

Well… until tomorrow.

**A/N: Please don't forget to review and let me know whether I should continue to write more of these short stories. Or whether I'm embarrassing myself and should stop. Thanks!**


	2. Marvellous

**A/N: Okay so this was a request from Y.O.L.O So do it right, who was also my first reviewer so shoutout! :) okay I'm gonna be honest I was slightly confused by the request but I hope this is what you meant. Also, I hope this doesn't offend anyone, that was not the intention. Enjoy!**

If there was one person Katniss hated more than Wimpy Peeta for always following her around, it was Gale. And if there was anyone that she hated more than Depressing Gale it was Marvel. Who, of course, was the idiot that she had to sit with in band class. It was the most frustrating thing.

Playing the clarinet was the coolest darn thing, was it not? Well, that's what Katniss had thought. And that's why she had signed up for the class. Turns out that all the other losers she knew had chosen boring things like sports and drama. Did they know _nothing_ about how to become popular? Once she learnt to play clarinet, _all_ the boys would want her – not just Peeta and Gale. It would just take time. She was already pretty good, though.

Marvel had obviously come to the same conclusion as her, that playing clarinet was the height of sexiness, much to her utter irritation. Which meant that she had to spend two hours a week, stuck next to him.

He was a player. Correction, he _thought_ he was but, in actual fact, couldn't get a girl. Which is why he used the player thing as a cover up. Pretty pathetic, if you asked Katniss. I mean, how hard could it be to get a girlfriend? She already had two boys and she didn't even try. _Not everybody can be as fabulous as you_, she reminded herself.

"Hey, Katniss, baby, I made you a tune," Marvel told her as he began to spit into his clarinet, making horrible noises.

"Marvel, stop. You're embarrassing yourself. Nothing's ever gonna happen between us so stop trying."

He just scowled, ignoring her and carrying on with his playing.

"Katniss, stop taking up all the space with your flabby arms!"

He always got angry when she rejected him. Which was all the time. Some people would have gotten angry, but fortunately, Katniss had a very patient temper. There was no point in losing it over something so stupid.

"_Shut the fuck up Marvel or so help me I'll shoot an arrow though your head after class!_"

"You always do this!" he cried back, shaking his clarinet around in anger. In fact, it wasn't just the clarinet that was shaking. His whole body had started twitching and trembling – it was pretty hilarious, actually. Maybe that's why he couldn't get a girl.

"I always do what? Just because I play better than you Marvel, you don't need to take it out on me."

Ha, that would tell him.

Suddenly, the shaking became to much and, just when it seemed that he was about to explode with anger, he gripped onto his clarinet with two hands and snapped it in half. Wood splintered everywhere, some bits flying into his eyes, while some sprayed on to other students.

"AHHHHH!" he yelled, flailing around. "Katniss, help me, I can't see!"

By this point Katniss hadn't been able to control her laughter at the semi-blind idiot before her eyes and had somehow ended up on the floor, creasing with laughter.

"Nice, one," she congratulated Marvel between snorts.

"Katniss!" she suddenly heard her name being called, followed by frantic footsteps. "Katniss, I came as fast as I could!"

When she looked up, there stood Wimpy-Face-McStalker himself.

"Peeta? What the hell are you doing here? You're not even in this class!"

"I heard your name so I came running, and thank goodness I did! You're lying on the floor! I thought you were dead!_ What happened_?"

Katniss just rolled her eyes as Peeta freaked out.

"Marvel got wood in his eyes," she answered, starting to laugh once more at the memory.

"Marvel!" Peeta exclaimed. "How could you do this to Katniss? I thought we were friends!"

"Peeta, you don't have any friends," Katniss tried to remind him but he was past listening.

It was funny because Marvel wasn't even listening to him. He was still trying to clear out his eyes and make his way out the room to see the nurse.

Peeta suddenly made a strange strangled kind of noise that Katniss supposed he thought was a roar, before charging at Marvel with his fists out in front of him. Oh, Lord.

"You. Must. Pay!" he called, running at full speed. Which, for Peeta, was about half the speed of the slowest person you know.

Marvel didn't even acknowledge him, he just flicked his arm out as Peeta was nearing him, causing Peeta to run into it and topple on to the floor.

"Ow!" he yelped, holding his head.

Marvel shook his head and stumbled out the door.

"Don't worry, Katniss!" Peeta yelled from his spot on the floor. "I'll get him back!"

Katniss, placed her head in her hands.

"I don't _care_."

Wasn't there anyone normal at this stupid High School?

The next week when Katniss showed up to band class, Marvel was already sitting in his seat with a new clarinet. She couldn't help laughing a little. He was such a loser.

"Hey, Marv," she greeted him, sitting down.

"Don't call me that, piss face."

"Whatever. Hey, did you revise for the test?"

"What? No. Did you?"

Katniss smiled smugly.

"Yep. But only the first half of the topics because I got bored and went and killed some innocent squirrels."

Marvel just looked at her for a second.

"Right. Well I know the second half of the topics really well anyway because I already studied them before I came to this school."

"I see."

They just looked at each other for long while, neither one of them wanting to speak first.

Finally, Marvel cleared his throat.

"So, um, wanna share answers?"

"Hmm. Okay, only if you agree to a couple of conditions."

"Name them."

Katniss grinned.

"You're not allowed to call me piss face, shit head or anything else like that. It's really mean."

Marvel sighed with a frown but finally agreed.

"Fine. What else?"

"You can't comment on my arm fat. I'm on a diet okay?"

"Yeah, alright."

"Oh and one last thing. Punch Peeta in the face for me next time you see him?"

"Sure. Why?"

"No reason. He just annoys the hell out of me."

Marvel nodded in agreement on behalf of everyone who ever lived.

"So, are you gonna show me your answers too?" Katniss asked him.

"Only, if _you_ agree to some things as well."

"I don't think so," Katniss scoffed. Who did he think she was?

Marvel looked outraged for a second.

"Fine then, I won't show you my answers."

"Then I won't show you mine," she replied.

"What? But I need yours!"

"Not my problem."

She waited a couple of seconds.

"Ugh. Fine, you can see mine without any conditions."

Katniss smothered her laughter. He was such an idiot.

"Cool."

The test was over fairly quickly and was marked right way by their teacher. Of course, Katniss and Marvel came joint top in the class. Man, they were awesome. Katniss would be able to get anyone she wanted now that she could play clarinet like a pro _and_ be at the top of her band class.

When the lesson ended, as they were packing away to leave, Marvel turned to Katniss with a smile that, for once, wasn't mocking or pervy or creepy or rude. Just… normal.

"Hey, Katniss?"

"What?"

"Thanks for the answers," he told her, seeming genuine.

She shrugged.

"You too, I guess."

There was a couple of seconds of silence where neither of them quite knew what to say.

"So, um… wanna be friends?" Katniss asked eventually.

Marvel nodded.

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay."

They walked out of class together in silence. Who'd have thought Katniss would end up being friends with Marvel, of all people? But there was absolutely _no one_ normal at Panem High School, so you couldn't exactly afford to be picky.

Once they reached the corridor outside, Peeta immediately sprang out of nowhere and tried to wrap his arms around Katniss. She batted him away.

"Katniss, my loaf, I missed you!"

Katniss just looked at Marvel with a raised eyebrow and that was all it took. Marvel's first came flying out of nowhere and hit Peeta directly in the nose. He screamed like a girl and ran off bawling, of course. They didn't call him Pathetic Peeta for nothing, you know.

Katniss grinned, holding her fist out. Marvel spudded her, looking just as pleased. They began walking to their next class together, discussing the things that annoyed them most about Peeta.

It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

**A/N there you go, let me know what you thought of it! Keep sending any requests that you want or just let me know any particular characters that you want to see or whatever. And again, please tell me if these are beyond terrible and I should just stop. Okay bye! x**


	3. Finnicking Hell

**A/N: Okay so I know the last chapter sucked but meh sorry. Hope this is somewhat better. I am aware that there is a request and I will get to work on that asap! Any feedback is much appreciated and suggestions are welcome. Enjoy :)**

**Note: Imagine Annie doesn't exist in this chapter or something or she isn't dating Finnick. Don't get me wrong, I ship Odesta, they just aren't together in this story. No hate please.**

"Thanks, Finnick," Katniss smiled hugging the boy and walking away with Clove.  
Gale snarled to himself. He pretty much hated everyone, but the one person who really got on his tits was Finnick Odair. What did everyone see in him? Sure he may have had lucious bronze hair but Katniss's greasy braid was so much nicer. And maybe his body was tanned and muscular but Katniss had flabby arms and pasty skin. What would you choose? Gale would always pick Katniss over anyone, of course.  
Which is why it angered him so much to see Odair making moves on her. No one was allowed to make moved on Katniss but Gale himself, since he were to be her future husband.

Suddenly, Peeta Mellark showed up out of nowhere. Ah, another person that Gale despised. He seemed to think that something was going to happen between him and Katniss. As if she'd ever sink so low.

"Go away, Mellark, no one wants you."

"But-"

"_No one_."

Peeta sighed, otherwise ignoring Gale.

"But did you see Katniss just now? She was with Finnick. They were…" he lowered his voice, "_touching_!"

Gale frowned. As much as he hated Pathetic Peeta, he was right to be outraged by Katniss becoming close to Finnick. It was simply unacceptable.

"I know," Gale replied angrily. "Something has to be done about him, thinking he can steal Katniss from me."

"You mean me?" Peeta interjected.

Gale really wasn't in the mood to argue with him. Besides, it wouldn't get him anywhere – everyone knew Peeta was a nutcase.

"Whatever. Look he's flirting with Katniss all the time and it has to stop!"

Well, this had actually been the first time he'd seen it, but still. Who knew what would happen if they didn't act now?

"I declare… ATTAACCKK!" Peeta shouted charging off in the direction that Finnick had gone in.

Wow. Gale had known he was an idiot but – just, wow. _I guess I'll have to fix this alone_, he decided.

Either way, he was getting his wifey back.

Their last lesson of the day was English, where him, Peeta, Katniss and Finnick were all in the same class. Gale was sitting at the back, alone, as he liked it. He quickly ripped a piece of paper out of his exercise book and scribbled down a message. '_Tell me the truth: is there something going on between you and Finnick? What's he got that I haven't?'_

He lobbed at Katniss's seat and turned back to his work, not wanting her to catch him starring at her. Cos that had happened a couple of times before. Two words: real awkward.

A couple of minutes later, the ball of paper sailed back to his table. He scrambled to flatten it out in anticipation of Katniss's reply.

'_I'll be honest, there would be something going on between me and Finnick if it were up to me, but it would seem that he doesn't see me in that way. What's he got that you haven't? Hahaha good one. He's got everything and you've got… well, nothing. Why would you ask me that anyway, silly Gale, you know I loaf Katniss. Okay bye! xxxx'_

Wait, what? Gale did a double take, looking up at where the note had come from. There was Peeta one seat away from Katniss, looking over at Gale and waving frantically.

"Hey, Gale! Did you get my note?"

Gale face-palmed in exasperation. He had honestly never met anyone as stupid as Peeta.

_I guess I'll just have to talk to her_, he thought to himself. _Just one thing – make sure Peeta isn't around._

After class ended Gale waited until everyone had left the room, including the teacher, except for Katniss.

"Hey, Katniss, wait up a sec," he called as she was leaving.

Katniss just stared at him for a second in revulsion.

"Gale, I told you not to talk to me in public."

He just chuckled. Katniss could be so funny sometimes. That was one of the main reasons he loved her.

"So anyway, I have something to ask you."

"Ugh. Can you make it quick? Unlike you, I actually have people to see."

Again, with the humour. She was just perfect.

"Well, it's about Finnick."

She shrugged.

"What about him?"

"I just want to kno-"

"Hey, Katniss, you here?" a voice cut him off.

Of course, it was Finnick Odair rounding the corner.

"Oh, hi Gale. I was just checking on Katniss," he told them, turning to look at her. "Is everything okay? You were right behind me."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I'm just leaving anyway-"

"But we're not finished!" Gale whined.

"Uh, yes, Gale, we are."

Katniss turned to leave with Finnick at her side when Peeta jogged through the door, slightly out of breath.

"Sorry, I left my pen…" he then laid his eyes on Gale, Katniss and Finnick. "Hey, guys! Why didn't you tell me you were having a meeting? Katniss, I've been looking everywhere for you!"

Katniss raised her eyebrows in concern.

"Um… why?"

"I think you mean why _not_? Am I right? HAHAHAHAHAHA," Peeta answered, collapsing in hysterical laughter at himself.

"So anyway… we're gonna leave now," Finnick declared when Peeta had calmed down.

"No, don't go!" Gale told them. "Look, since we're all here, there's something I need to know."

Katniss glowered at him.

"Fine! But make it quick. The squirrels don't kill themselves, you know."

Gale grinned in delight. He loved it when Katniss talked dirty.

"Okay. Katniss: is there something going on between you and Finnick?"

Peeta looked up at him.

"But that's what you asked _me_ earlier! Someone's a little obsessed with Finnick!" he exclaimed, giggling ridiculously again.

Everyone ignored him, as usual. Katniss was starring at Gale, open-mouthed.

"No, of course not. But even if there was it's none of your damn business!"

"What do you mean? I thought we were in love!" he answered with a wail.

"Katniss, I thought there was something between us!" Finnick added.

Peeta joined in by singing so everyone ignored him again.

"_Hey, I'm a baker_

_And this is craaaazy,_

_But I loaf Katniss,_

_So call me maybe_?"

Katniss, threw her hands in the air in frustration.

"Peeta, _SHUT UP_."

Just as she looked like she was about to punch someone in the face, Clove, one of Katniss's best friends, entered the room.

"Whoa, whoa, what's all the noise, guys?" she asked, twirling a knife in her hand. Why did she always do that?

"Look, it's private-" Gale began but Katniss cut him off. Well, that was okay – he loved hearing her deep, croaky voice.

"Finnick, Gale and Peeta have just declared their love for me," she explained, briefly.

"Ahh. We all knew this day was coming," Clove grinned. "You know what this means. Cooonnttessstt!"

"Battle of the boys!" Katniss exclaimed in agreement. "Awesome!"

"Ooh, I love games!" Peeta chirped in, clapping his hands. "I know – let's have a bake off!"

"Seriously, Katniss, you're letting him compete?" Clove asked, rolling her eyes.

Katniss shrugged.

"It's only fair."

Gale was past listening – if there were to be a contest, he was going to have to make sure he won. He would _not_ be losing to Finnick Odair.

"Roll-up, roll-up!" Clove called, standing at the door of the empty classroom. It had been a week since the announcement and today was the day – Battle of the Boys.

Gale had no idea how they had managed to secure an empty classroom without any teachers noticing but didn't worry too much. There was an audience gathered at the back of the room while a table had been dragged near the front where Katniss was sat. There was a space cleared at the front that would work like a stage for the competitors.

Finnick, Peeta and him were all waiting 'backstage', basically just outside the door from the chosen room.

Finnick was fluffing out his hair and applying another coat of fake tan. Peeta was singing and dancing around. Good God.

Gale himself seemed to be the only normal one there, glancing into the room of awaiting people. He had this. It was obvious Katniss wanted him.

"Hush!" Clove shouted, after a while, at the audience of students gathered in the room. "The time has come to select one courageous young man and er- just one man, to take Katniss's hand in marriage."

"My _what_?" Katniss squeaked.

"Oops, I mean to have Katniss as their girlfriend. And maybe one day, her hand in marriage."

Katniss just frowned, otherwise saying nothing.

"Okay, so the competitors will come up to the front, one by one and wow Katniss with some kind of special skill or talent. Then, at the end, Katniss's will see who scored the highest, and he shall be crowned champion!"

The crowd cheered and whooped in anticipation of the first performance.

"So, without further a-do, please welcome to the stage; Peeta Mellark!" Clove announced.

Peeta shot Gale a thumbs up before strolling onto the stage, completely uncoordinatedly.

Clove took her seat next to Katniss at the judging table.

"So, Peeta, what's your special skill?"

"Well, I think it's pretty obvious, don't you? I'm going to… SING!"

Every single student in the room groaned - even Peeta himself, who joined in because he was just that stupid.

"Oh, and dance," he added with a grin.

_Well, at least he's making it easier for me_, Gale thought to himself, tasting the inevitable victory.

Clove pulled her head out of her hands to answer Peeta.

"Fine. Just make it quick."

Peeta beamed, even more, nodding at Marvel who was in control of the tunes.

"Hit it!"

And with that, the stereo was switched on the 'It's Raining Men' music began blaring out of the speakers. Just before the lyrics started, he ripped off the thick jacket and pants he'd been wearing, revealing his outfit underneath which consisted of a shirt made entirely of silver sequins and pink shorts.

"_Hi - Hi! We're your Weather Girls - Ah-huh -  
And have we got news for you - You better listen!  
Get ready, all you lonely girls  
and leave those umbrellas at home. - Alright!_"

Oh, God. Absolutely everyone just stared in bewilderment with their mouths wide open as Peeta shimmied around the impromptu stage. As the chorus rapidly approached, he leaped up onto the judges table where Katniss was seated and began singing at the top of his lungs.

"_It's raining bread! Hallelujah, it's raining bread! _

_I'm gonna stay in, and make myself a cake,_

_And bake and bake and bake and baaakkke…_

_It's raining bread! Hallelujah, it's raining bread! Every specimen!_

_Rough, burnt, soft and square,_

_It's so much better than a snaaaree…_

_It's raining bread!_"

He finished by collapsing on to his knees and bowing his head for dramatic effect.

Everyone, including Katniss, still had their mouths hanging open and no one was quite sure how to respond. A couple of members of the crowd clapped their hands once or twice but no one else even moved.

Gale tried to process what had just happened but couldn't quite figure it out.

"Thanks, folks!" Peeta cried, jumping to my feet. "Katniss, I know you'll make the right decision."

Then he turned and left the room, joining Finnick and Gale in the corridor.

"What did you think, guys?" he panted.

"I… I don't even know what to say," Finnick answered him eventually and even Gale agreed.

"It was that good? Aww, thanks you guys!"

Peeta clapped happily to himself.

"Um, so after whatever that was," Clove told the audience, "please welcome… Gale Hawthorne!"

Gale took a couple of breaths before walking out to face the students.

"So, Gale, what's _your _skill?" Clove asked him.

He grinned, eager to show them his well prepared performance.

"I'm going to be doing a bit of drama for everyone today."

"Oh. Well, okay, Good luck!" she answered as the audience clapped in excitement. It wasn't the biggest applause but, hey, it was bigger than Peeta's.

He glanced at Marvel who hit the play button on the music.

The song Gale had chosen was 'Pick Me' by Justin Bieber.

As the lyrics began playing, he took out a palm-sized heart that he'd carved from wood. He'd engraved the words 'Katniss's heart' on to the block of wood.

"_You should pick me,_

_Tell me can you dig it,_

_I'm everything you need girl,_

_So tell me you can dig it_."

Gale then whipped out a long piece of wire and began twisting it expertly, not to mention in time to the music. It was all going too smoothly.

"_I'll always be your number one,_

_Number one fan,_

_And I should be your one and only_

_Man._"

Justin Bieber blared away in the background as he finished making the snare and hooked it around the lamp shade hanging from the centre of the ceiling. Suddenly, the music cut off to build suspense. He waited a couple of seconds before the big finale where he placed a kiss on the heart and flicked it out of his hands. The small chunk of wood sailed towards the awaiting snare, where it caught and remained hanging by the wire.

"Katniss, I have captured your heart," he declared, then adding in a whisper, "pick me."

Then Gale turned and left the room just as Peeta had done, head held high in success.

Some members of the audience clapped while others remained unmoving.

"Oh… kay. Well, again, not quite sure what that was but thank you, Gale!" Clove cried, standing up. "Next up, we have the one, the only… Finnick Odair!"

Gale watched as Finnick stood in the doorway, ready to go on but not actually entering the room yet.

Without warning, the music started up. It was the tuneful introduction to 'Bringing Sexy Back' by Justin Timberlake. Of course he'd choose something vain like that.

Finnick waited a little while before slowly walking on to the stage seductively.

He didn't sing or dance or even act, just walked to the centre and stood there, looking around with a lazy smirk for a couple of minutes as the song played.

After that, he winked at Katniss and walked off, looking pleased with himself.

The crowd erupted into applause and every single girl started screaming at him.

"_Finnick! We love you!_"

"_Show us your sugar cubes!_"

"_You should win!"_

What the hell? He hadn't even done anything.

"Wow. Thanks for that Finnick," Clove grinned, fanning herself. "Now, welcome back to the stage, our three competitors Peeta Mellark, Gale Hawthorne and Finnick Odair!"

Gale walked back out into the room of people, followed by the other two.

"Now, I'll leave it to Katniss to announce the results, although it seems to me that we have an obvious winner."

Katniss stood up with her answer card.

"Thanks, Clove. Now-"

"Wait!" a voice bellowed from the back of the room.

Suddenly, Thresh appeared out of nowhere, making his way to the front of the room. He stopped when he was in front of Katniss's table.

"Look, Katniss, I know I'm not even part of the contest and I didn't compete but just know we could make it work. If you chose me I would rock your world."

Clove scowled at the rock reference but didn't say anything.

"Oh, Thresh!" Katniss breathed, jumping over the table and into his arms. "What the hell, I choose _you_!"

"_What_?" Gale exclaimed at the same time as Finnick and Peeta.

"He didn't even compete!"

"What the heck, Katniss?"

"But I loaf you!"

"Shut up, all of you! I just want Thresh, okay?"

With that, they ran out of the room together holding hands before anyone even had a chance to say anything else.

There was a couple of beats of silence.

"Well, for the third time today, I'm not quite sure what just happened but it looks like Thresh won!" Clove announced.

The audience shrugged at first but soon started cheering.

Gale growled angrily, storming out of the classroom and not stopping until he reached the forest where he sometimes hunted with Katniss. He eventually reached his private spot where he wanted to clear his head, only to find Katniss and Thresh making out under a bush.

"Katniss!" Gale wailed, breaking down in tears. "It's over!"

He ran off sobbing. A second or two later, he crashed into someone else who was also bawling their eyes out. He looked up.

"Peeta?"

Peeta sniffed and stayed quiet for a long time.

"Do you… do you want to come try some of my new bread?" he asked.

Gale considered it briefly but then shrugged.

"Sure, why not."

So he began the short walk down to the bakery with Peeta.

And who knew? Maybe they'd even be friends…

**Please, please don't forget to review :)**


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